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Messages - matthias

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346
adoring people, loving without condition is a good thing....but loving god is much better

and the reward of loving god is that you become love...so it is the most rewarding love on this planet or not? because it is not bound to time; space; persons; places etc...it is boundless love..superb and wonderfull in nature..

but jet it needs time till the one realizes that loving god = the reward itself

I have this from the upadesa saram....I cannot remmeber the words of bhagavan but this is what I understood

347
oh so true dr raju

a very wonderfull explanation

if I surrender to "this" then there is no death, death is not known by it, also matthias is not known by it, jet in the conceptual world that is still there I know that death exists, and Iam exissting but when I surrender to the impossible nature of this moment then there is not death, I cannot find it, and I also cannot find my mind...

therefor ramana maharishi and his method is godsend, the purest meditation on this planet....

I love him very much ----this is my little truth


348
General Discussion / how do you experience yourselfs?
« on: October 30, 2008, 06:55:09 PM »
In this topic I would like to exchange inner happenings of the seekers at the moment, what is there in their sadhana//life, how does it feel...I would like to start this discussion because I think if we will come across similarities in experience,Intuition and expression of who we really are, we could benefit on our way...I think it could be helpfull to get rid of ignorance and get closer to the truth...

I start with my condition:

usually the meditation and enquiery is part of my day, it does not stop, I do not have a fixed time...

since some days I feel that Iam expressed...it is hard to explain in words, I just feel an energy that comes from nowhere and expresses itself, it is a ongoing feeling and the best word to discribe it is expression.....I cannot say stop or come, I cannot meditate about it nor can I avoid when it is there....it is a very sweet and loving feeling...

it seems to be very subtile in nature, it feels alittle like seeing with the eyes of an atom (again my skin is vibrating, my body feels very weightless and good, warm and embraced)....jet if I want to see the center of this expression the center is gone...or when I want to see the where it comes from it is gone, or not there...

when I am still (no movement, no talking, no work, no sitting down to meditation...then the feeling is very clear, very near, when I talk, and do something it vanishes, or I get swallowed by what I do)

when this "feeling" is obvious or percieved by me then Iam this energy, and there is no need to ask who am I, or to meditate...but at the same time it is not stainless or pure awereness, it is a cleared self awereness but not supreme...jet when I rest as this energy Iam happy and ok, it feels like this is not coming or going it is always there and at the same time I loose it again and again...

I also cannot sleep very good since one day......when i lay down to sleep then this feeling is there, and for me I cannot sleep out of this energy, till now, we will see how it workes today....this periods of no sleeping is a usual thing for me, some times I sleep very very well, just one interruption (thirst or toilet) or I do not sleep at all....this not sleeping always comes when something chnaged in my awereness, or mostly...

maybe some advice and also some insights in your present condition

much love
peace peace peace



349
General Discussion / Re: Difficulties
« on: October 29, 2008, 06:26:25 PM »
I pray for your peace, and that you may return to the point in your middle soon...

ken Wilber said:

in the eye of the hurricane you are safe...


It is very important to do the work you should do, you will feel much better if you are in tune with the plan of god (this means working, studding and whatever is happening in your life as a worldy duty)...

No Alcohol Sir, Meditaiton and Drugs are two different worlds.....

I guess you sit alot, so please go jogging..... and make some hatha yoga, a healthy body is easier to transcend

drink alot of water to purify you, sometimes we do not have much energy because we do not drink water....this can make us frustrated and angry

2 glass of water before every meal and 1 glass afterwards


I wish you peace




350
getting angry with god can happen if it likes to happen, but I was not angry with god for along time, the only thing that can arise in my mind concerning this question could be that god seems to be far away instead of beeing right here inside and outside of me, this hurts but at the same time this is part of the path...so god is to be seen and loved always, just as he is always seeing and loving....

nothing else to do with god in this life, just see him and love him, and infact from time to time, I feel that he is it who loves me and sees me, and that there is nobody here that does the seeing and loving....

then it is quiet and peacefull, then life=light, beeing=happiness and worries are gone, together with the thoughts and feelings....






351
Meister Eckhardt the great christian mystic said someting like:

everything that god gives us, or does not give us, is always the best for us, so you should not get angry with him, because it is his nature to always do his best for us, and this is how it shuold be seen, as the greatest gift he bestowed upon us...everything else is not right!

he also used to explain this with the help of the lords prayer: ..

Our Father, who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name.
Thy Kingdom come,
thy will be done, <-------this is the crucial verse
on earth as it is in heaven
Give us this day our daily bread.

he said that most people pray this prayer daily but if his will is done, they get angry....and it is always his will that is done....and his will is of course the best thing for the soul...


352
I come to tis fear also in my meditaition from time to time...

its is like a confrontation with somehting that is totally out of controll, a part of the mind that the mind cannot hold...when I get a glimpse of it (this is indeed a space that is ever-present, and that expresses itself without my help, or controll) then I know that I have to totally surrender anything Iam made of to it...and this is impossible, and to scary to think about...

I know now to fully embody this is due to grace of the beyond and great surrender of the mind, a surrender that swallows and digests the mind....

353
I loved to read this because it is the plane truth...

sadhana is fruitful only if there is no boundery in time, meditation//self-enquiery has to be carried on longer and longer, into the dreaming state as well--

today I had a strange dream, then I realized the "watcher" I realized that "Iam" seeing the dream, suddenly the dream began to change in enviroment and feeling......I heard my self proclaim very honsetly and strongly: IAM SAT CHIT ANANDA...and a light and love energy replaced the dream and I was this energy, it was there for just a view seconds....then I awoke to antoher dream...and then the self-awereness was gone..

and it is true what is said by Subramanian, reading this forum posts daily, reading in the upanishads or looking at the picture of Bhagavan is an aid to remember the sadhana....and it purifies the mind of negative concepts and replaces them with positive ones...

peace peace peace


354
that is a very helpfull post for me, I can agree totally with what bhagavan said...

but for me it prooved to be helpfull to start with closed eyes, and a mantram to calm hte mind and then slowly meditate on what is and open the eyes....

I do think that meditation with open eyes also helpes for remebering the inner space at the daytime....it helps in the process of beeing meditated instead of going to meditate

355
General topics / Re: what is Ananda
« on: October 22, 2008, 08:24:12 PM »
wonderfull said both of you :)

356
General topics / Re: introduction and some questions
« on: October 22, 2008, 01:39:40 PM »
dear dr raju this is very correct

the thing is I do not expereince it in this way....so how can I talk about it? I just can refer to what is known by myself.

dear subramanian thank you for the answer and also for reminding me to dont stop where Iam like dr raju also did...tis is avery important thing to do..

I think that the heart cave is a very dangerous spot, because you are allowed to expereince and recieve great grace and happiness there, so if you start to enjoy to much you will not reach the goal..

and thank you both for encouraging me to go on..

in fact the path is so wonderfull to follow that I would not stop because of this hurdles

much love
matthias


357
General topics / Re: what is Ananda
« on: October 22, 2008, 01:30:04 PM »
I think inner spiritual happiness or even blissfull states are a byproduct of the meditation or self enquiery, they come natural after some time (if the soul is to recieve it in this life)...

when I sit to meditate, then there comes a state that makes me forget body and mind, (jet they are still there, but not so important) there shines someting that is much more whole, it is not disrupted or moving so much like body sensations or thoughts//feeling, (I know that this is a state or how you like to call it, that is more permanent then body and mind, jet it is not the self) this is also very close to what is, or the moment, there also arises deep happiness and gratitute for beeing alive in this state...it also has an impact on my body, it feels like my body gets a love//energy massage or little needles or bubbles are exploding on the skin, and this wonderfull feeling is even stronger then the usual body sensations (jet the body is still percieved)...

I just can speak out of my knowledge or intuitiv knowledge now: when Iam there (or when I am this state) then there is sometimes a short blink or "aha" that there is someting underneath this or before it, a light that is not constructed or meditated upon or whatever, something that is there but just to be reached if everything else is given up, all kind of mental control, sometimes my whole beeingness wants to disolve in this, but it scares me to much, and I know that Iam not ripe for this insight......I dont know why, but this is the truth: I feel that Iam not allowed to go there jet..

but what I know is that there starts the true happiness,....it feels like this is a very fine layer of reality, I cannot say that it is the source of all that is, but Iam helpless there, without something to grap, it feels like I would be consumed by it......




and David this concept or energy within the mind process to kill the mind is something I also experience alot of times, I think this is even a very big hurdle......I feel that self enquiery is more an energetic process then a process of the question "who am I" this question cannot be asked with the mind...(sounds strange) but I think that this question is really just an aid on the path of self enquiery (the essence that this path is composed of brought into language), thats all....so when my mind is very active and I ask this question then this makes the whole thing worse..

I think what bhagavan was meaning by this words (nan yar) was realy if you sit in meditation (or if you become meditated), and you are quiet and peacefull // happy you should always question the energy that you feel to be "you" and this is a silent activity as most meditative states are much deeper then the intellect.....

and when you are emerged into this ocean of joy and the mind arises somewhere, then why should you ask the mind to stop with minding around? If you feel to be this ocean, then let the mind be mind and let it arise....we dont have to reach nirvikalpa samadhi in one day like bhagavan, in fact this seems to be very unreal to me :)







 

358
General topics / introduction and some questions
« on: October 21, 2008, 11:56:58 PM »
Good evening dear people
 short introduction:

I came across the words of ramana maharishi 2 years ago, his words and his gracefull eyes have changed my life like nothing else in the world. Iam forever gratefull for his guidence, his love and light that he has bestowed upon me.....

I have some quesitons as I see that most of you have alot of knowledge and expereince in the fields of the vedas....

first question is concerning the heart center as mentioned in the books and talks by the maharishi:

when I meditate upon this center then there arise different feelings and sensations like:

I feel my life force, or some sort of energy (life energy) is centered there, this energy is radiating and changes its form, its is still, thin or thick and moving like a liquid...it is not possible to grasp or hold this energy with my awereness it seems like it is formless, or a nothing, when I try to hold this it vanishes, when I forget to hold it the it comes back in different forms..

sometimes the inner room that Iam is mirrored in this center, for example: when I mediate upon it, then I "see" at the same time the "I" that sees this moment...like a mirror...
 since I meditate on this center my life becomes more and more centered there, when I act and stay focused on this cneter then my movements and actions are motivated by love, and everymoment seems to be right like it is,sometimes beeing is just blissfull when I act out of this center

another sensation is that my skin starts to vibrate with a very wonderfull feeling, like small needles are piercing me, it is a great feeling...

my question is: Is this the heart center ramana is talking about?

Iam blessed that this meditation started to happen from within itself sometimes, so when I work I still feel this, or "remember" it... my awereness moves from the outside to this center, it is like Iam meditated...I do not have to do it. to start it....no sitting down or whatever it just starts to happen......


My second quesiton is: since 3 years, and since 1 or 2 years in special, I have a knot in my throat chackra, and also in my upper chest, this knot feels like the seat of my separated self, the seat of ingnorence, so if Iam lost in thoughts the pressure on this knot becomes stronger (when I have heavy ego-returns, or when Iam lost in negative//destructive thoughts, this sensation or pressures becomes so strong that I wish to die), when Iam identified with the silence and room within myself then the presure or the knot is just a small irritation on the ocean...

can you give me some information about this (I know from other seekers//mystics that the knot in the throat chackra is a common sensation on the path, but I do not know any more) and can you also give some advise on how to deal with it? maybe a meditation or mantram...

peace peace peace

much love
matthias

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