Author Topic: Self enquiry holding onto I feeling inputs sought.  (Read 257 times)

Anand

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Self enquiry holding onto I feeling inputs sought.
« on: February 04, 2020, 06:48:14 PM »
Dear friends, While I have been practicing the method of asking to whom are these questions, who am I, I would like to request forum members on briefly explaining how the holding onto the I am feeling is practiced, aspects related to it and how to avoid pitfalls.
Thanks, Anand.
Sundaram Anand

Jewell

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Re: Self enquiry holding onto I feeling inputs sought.
« Reply #1 on: February 09, 2020, 06:49:20 AM »
Dear Sri Anand,

Regarding self enquiry practice,for me is most helpful to read Bhagavan's and Maharaj's words about it. At first,I used method 'I,I,I'm,to bring attention to that sense of 'I',my own existence,the sense of being. Later,and these days,I am following Maharaj's words,to hold this 'I am' without words. He pointed many times in His works,to hold this I,but at the same time,not taking myself to be the body,and focusing on I am without words. At the beginning,this practice gave me such great joy,and some strange overpowering peace,and I practiced it for many hours,with great effort. Later,I began to use other practices,got distracted,and after it had to use even greater efforts to resume practice. But,one thing I have understood in the mean time,and that is that I used at first much mental effort,which was mistake. I had headaches,and many other side effects,so to say. Now I am always reminding myself of Bhagavan's words,not to use mind,but heart wile practicing self enquiry. Maharaj also pointed that this practice should be effortless. As they said,-' Don't be this,or that,just BE.'

My experience about self enquiry is that is not at all dangerous,it doesn't have any side effects,it is completely safe,and it brings such great transformation,that it is truly amazing. It is something I have never experienced, something most wonderful and it never stops to amaze me. It is actually our true Self,God-One and Only,which brings this wonderful transformation. It brings peace,joy and tremendous clarity,it takes away all the anxiety,fears, everything which makes ego actually. It feels so natural,so refreshing,so normal. Maharaj's Guru,Sadguru Sri Siddharameshwar called this path 'Bird's way',coz it is fast and without pitfalls. And my experience is the same.

Sure,what is dangerous and can use absolutely everything against us,is the mind only. Recently gaves me much trouble,not while practice it,but to make myself to begin. I get distracted so easily. Mind can bring great trouble and great danger,I have seen this very well. And that is when it tricked me to stop with practice. But these are just delusions,nothing more. And when it takes away us from the path,as it seems,it is not so in reality. These experiences,life itself,mistakes,all, absolutely all is needed as a wake up call,as the ways to show us how mind works,its subconscious,to help us understand what we are not,and how it functions in reality. To bring all on the surface.
So all is well,and all is needed. After all,we are not the body or the mind,and we need to absorb that while experience duality. Reading Bhagavan's works, devotional poetry,listening bhajans,and praying with great sincerity,is greatly helpful along with self enquiry. And I would say as a must too! Great devotion to Guru is necessary too. That means faith in His words and following the practice He recommended. That will take away the danger of this path. No matter what we do,motive behind our spiritual quest is most essential.
Little by little,this quest must take most of our time and being,only then it is true sadhana. Coupled with life,for sure.
To look on the mind in a detached way,is needed too. Whatever we happen to do. That doesn't mean we should follow logic - I am not the mind,so I will do some bad thing,what does it matter. If we are not the mind,we can do good thing as well,is it not?! So,there is no need to plan,think should we do this or that. It is in His hands,ours is to do our practice. Only there is our power at the moment. Spontaneously and letting the nature to follow its course. And all will happen as it should coz it will bring clarity with it.
What else I saw also,is that if we make one little step towards God,He will take thousand toward us. What ever comes as heavy,loud,brings fear,is coming from the mind,from the shadow,not from God. His voice is sweet,quiet,His ways gentle, understanding and full of love. That is the way we can recognize the mind's workings.

Our true Self is Always there,waiting to take us over,and wake us up from this dream called life. I don't have all the answers,but this much I have saw.

edited.

With love,
« Last Edit: February 09, 2020, 07:15:56 AM by Jewell »

Anand

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Re: Self enquiry holding onto I feeling inputs sought.
« Reply #2 on: February 10, 2020, 06:21:55 PM »
Thank you, Jewell.
Sundaram Anand

Ravi.N

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Re: Self enquiry holding onto I feeling inputs sought.
« Reply #3 on: February 15, 2020, 08:05:58 AM »
Anand,
"While I have been practicing the method of asking to whom are these questions, who am I, I would like to request forum members on briefly explaining how the holding onto the I am feeling is practiced, aspects related to it and how to avoid pitfalls"

Jewel has given nice and helpful insights : "At first,I used method 'I,I,I'm,to bring attention to that sense of 'I',my own existence,the sense of being. Later,and these days,I am following Maharaj's words,to hold this 'I am' without words. He pointed many times in His works,to hold this I,but at the same time,not taking myself to be the body,and focusing on I am without words. At the beginning,this practice gave me such great joy,and some strange overpowering peace,and I practiced it for many hours,with great effort. Later,I began to use other practices,got distracted"

The essence of practice is in these words of Jewel.

Essentially there are two fundamental attitudes  and  consequent efforts towards spiritual practice....
1.I have to get it     and     2.I do not have to get it since there is nothing to be gained anew!

The 'I have to get it' is driven by desire and ambition and is what is termed as asura sadhana or Demonic Practice!It is egoistic striving and obviously is counter productive and defeats its own purpose.It is like any other worldly striving to achieve a certain result;only that it is directed towards achieving a 'spiritual' Result or Fruit....This is the ONLY pitfall in sadhana or spiritual practice and any earnest seeker would see through it and check himself from indulging in it.

The 'I do not have to get it since there is nothing to be gained anew!'....this is the shraddha that a seeker gets from the words of the Sadguru...it is the Shraddha that does the sadhana.
How is this Shraddha discovered?...By listening to the words of the Guru over and over again (if it is not discovered in the very first listening)...this is the power of Sravana or listening...this listening frees the seeker from the network of thoughts and activities and restores him to himself or his natural state of Being...no egoistic striving ever comes into play.

What is 'Holding onto the I ' means?...Words are always misleading and the mind interprets 'Holding' to mean some sort of a 'Clenching' and 'Clutching' ,very much like we hold onto a handle when we travel standing in a bus!....No...All that it means is not to let go of the simple Presence of who we are ,not to  'Forget it' in our day to day activities ....and as and when we get caught up in any thought or activity,to enquire 'who am I' meaning to recall the simple presence.(I am)...In fact to call the Presence as 'I' also is also not correct for it is an 'I am' where 'I' 'you' and 'They' are not there.

The very purpose of the enquiry 'nan yar' is to disengage the attention from identifying with every thought emotion and feeling and recall the simple Presence or Being...The Very Nature of this presence or Being is Peace.

There is no need to struggle with thoughts or emotions like anger lust,Fear,...Just stop them in their tracks by not identifying with them...The Ego 'I' is just a non existent centre put together by identification with thoughts and emotions...The 'i' does not exist as an entity  apart from such identification ...RECOGNITION of this is a powerful aid in immediately withdrawing onself from perpetuating the disturbing thought and dwell in the simple Presence.

Spiritual practice is not a part time activity and  alertness is to be sustained through every moment of waking hours ....and Forgetfulness of the Presence will have to be avoided...this is what is called as 'holding on to the I'.

Again ,there are two types of Forgetfulness and Remembrance.
One kind involves thoughts and Memory like we come to employ in the transactional world...If the memory is weak we tend to forget or take a longer time to recall what is forgotten....We then say that we Remember.

The Other type of 'Forgetfulness' is on account of inattention and this is what is called 'Pramada' ...It does not involve 'Memory' ...it involves inattention and carelessness which are the very opposite of 'Shraddha'.
'smarana' is the other type of 'Remembrance' that does not involve 'memory' but a recall of the ever living Presence.

'Satsangha' helps discover 'Shraddha' and sustain it.

Warmly recommend that you listen to Nochur Sri Venkatraman's talks and attend his satsangh whenever possible...Currently his talks on 'sivanubhavam' are on at Yogi Ramsurat Kumar Asramam at Tiruvannamalai and the talks (in Tamizh) are webcast through MIXLR.(14 02 2020- 20 20 2020 18:30 hrs -20:00 hrs)

Please refer: https://www.voiceofrishis.org/programme-listing/?v=c86ee0d9d7ed

http://live.voiceofrishis.org/

His talks are a boon for all devotees.

Namaskar





Anand

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Re: Self enquiry holding onto I feeling inputs sought.
« Reply #4 on: February 15, 2020, 06:11:36 PM »
Thank You, Ravi Sir.
Sundaram Anand


Anand

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Re: Self enquiry holding onto I feeling inputs sought.
« Reply #6 on: February 19, 2020, 06:48:22 AM »
Thank you Nishta. I just realised that our true nature always shines. That means we are even as we deal in worldly affairs are always in that divinity. Only  our thoughts be it good or bad drag us away.
So when thoughts disturb us, if we gently remind ourselves ,as a gentle mental shift how we were before the thought, we again go back to the inherent peace.This is the practice. At some point the inner power snaps the requirement of deliberate shift of focus and the screen comes to the forefront while mental activities still go on. Regards to all.
Sundaram Anand