Author Topic: background commentary during meditation  (Read 733 times)

Rajat

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background commentary during meditation
« on: February 13, 2017, 02:05:52 AM »
Hello All,
While meditating and vichara, I find that there's this nonstop background commentary going on in the mind. After this commentary starts,  this other part of the mind would emerge to control and do something about this commentary. And then there would be commentary about the commentary, and so on. I try to investigate to whom this all happens, but I'm so disturbed about this commentary that I can't properly meditate. Have any of you also ever felt this commentary, that judges and controls and condemns throughout the meditation? How do you respond to it?

Reading Krishnamurti I came across him saying 'The observer is the observed'. Pondering over this has helped me quite a lot. The content of consciousness is same as consciousness, he says. There aren't two entities in the mind, it is all the mind's making, this division between the commentator and that which is bothered by the commentator.

While I put myself the question Who Am I, I feel like there is a part of me that wants an answer, and  sort of feels disarmed when there doesn't seem to be an answer forthcoming. It seemed like I had a strong motive behind my meditation, behind the enquiry. And Krishnamurti says meditation cannot happen while there is this 'I' that has a motive behind all of this. So I would feel very confused during meditation and wasn't sure what exactly I was doing, searching for. But Bhagavan has said, Silence is his foremost teaching. To me it does feel much calmer to just sit and do nothing, to just be there, to not identify with all the movement in the mind. To not be concerned if I am not getting anywhere with any of this. But I do feel concerned, perhaps not during meditation, but during the rest of the day. Am I deluding myself somewhere, I ask?

This is my first post in this forum, and I was finally accepted as a member after a long wait, and I feel grateful to be here. I hope I have conveyed what I was trying to, quite clearly. I can't help thinking that me and my question here may have broken some forum etiquette (I'm obsessive that way) and I hope you will forgive me if I have. Thanks for giving my question your time and attention.

Ravi.N

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Re: background commentary during meditation
« Reply #1 on: February 14, 2017, 09:26:37 AM »
Rajat,
you have raised so many ideas 'meditation and vichara','Meditation time vs rest of the day time','Krishnamurti and Bhagavan','observer is the observed','silence is the foremost teaching','am i deluding myself somewhere,I ask?',etc,etc....so all these are just thoughts and  there cannot be any doubt regarding this.

All these are borrowed ideas from reading books and which are further expanded by our so called understanding or lack of it.

Now what is it that Bhagavan recommended as 'nan yar' or the ENQUIRY 'who am i'?....Is 'who am I' a question to be raised to which an answer has to be found?....no.

Who am I is to turn the attention immediately away  from all that goes on in our head and in the world outside ...and turn it on something that cannot be questioned or dismissed...something that is changeless in us....the 'I am' ,the presence that is not put together by any thought and hence cannot be dismissed....that which we always take for granted and get confused only when we are asked to define it...this simple presence which is ever the experience of every one of us and ever available.....so,vichara is simple recognition of this presence and no struggle need be there....yet,paradoxically it poses a great difficulty to be utterly simple!....please see if you can recognize this changeless ,ever present 'I am'....if you can,then this recognition would continue even amidst all thoughts and activities...it is not at loggerheads with anything...No borrowed knowledge is needed to arrive at this,rather they are a hindrance....approach it simply and see if this can be recognized.

Namaskar

Sadhak

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Re: background commentary during meditation
« Reply #2 on: February 15, 2017, 06:00:26 AM »
Dear Rajat,

Everyone will go through what you have described until liberation. That is just the way the mind (thought) operates. And it does so in all human beings other than jnanis who have destroyed the mind.

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It seemed like I had a strong motive behind my meditation, behind the enquiry. And Krishnamurti says meditation cannot happen while there is this 'I' that has a motive behind all of this. So I would feel very confused during meditation and

Krishnamurti uses the word meditation in a different sense altogether and not in the traditional sense of trying to control the mind.


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wasn't sure what exactly I was doing, searching for

It seems like everyone you are looking for mental peace and using your meditation to get a feel of it.


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But Bhagavan has said, Silence is his foremost teaching. To me it does feel much calmer to just sit and do nothing, to just be there, to not identify with all the movement in the mind

This is another idea of trying to NOT identify with the agitation in the mind. The core issue is not whether I identify or I don't identify but who is this I?  To pursue this question you can start to observe yourself as you are without any desire to change it and enter into some exalted state described in books. Of course it is not easy.


Jewell

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Re: background commentary during meditation
« Reply #3 on: February 16, 2017, 02:22:44 PM »
Dear Rajat,

Welcome to the forum!

Thoughts during meditation are common,they are simply habit,so,like our friends said,do not pay attention to them. It is indeed hard not to,and it seems almost impossible,but with practice and perseverance it is quite possible. Like Maharaj once said,disregard them like you disregard the crowd on the street. And, You will for sure arrive to the Truth if Your motives are sincere.

With love and prayers,

Rajat

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Re: background commentary during meditation
« Reply #4 on: February 19, 2017, 04:51:20 PM »
Thanks to all of you for your replies. I've never had such an interaction before, because all I've ever come across about spirituality has been through books. So it was nice to finally discuss with others about self-enquiry. Thanks!