Letters from Sri Ramanasramam:

[Jewell]

Dear sarakrishna, I am going through the similar things,for long time now. I also avoided  croud,and felt uneasy when with people. Even,i avoid it even now,and it is really hard to pull me out from my room ,ecsept if nature is option,some river and mountain,parks. But it is a choise now,i cant be with people if i want,no uneasiness anymore. But,also similar other things,i am often somewhere,i dont even dont know where. Betwean reality and nothingess... I dont know how to explane. Or i find it very hard to talk,i just look through people. Well,all that is natural byproduct of sadhana,and first is very strange,but later that feeling goes away,and everything settless. With love and prayers,

[Beloved Abstract]

 

[saraskrishna]

I bow down to this statement "simply stop telling the story of the self and see who you are without it" - ! Thank you 'beloved abstract'

Arunachala Shiva Ramanachala Shiva

[Subramanian.R]

133. Akshayalokam:

The day before yesterday, a Tamizh young man approached Sri Bhagavan in the afternoon and said: 'Swami, when I lay down
doing dhyana today, I fell asleep. Someone, I can't say who, appeared to me in my sleep. Seeing me, he said in a firm tone, 'God
has come down as an avatar of Kalki with fourteen heads. He is being brought up somewhere.' I have come here thinking that
sri Bhagavan will be able to tell me where that Kalki avatar now is.'

'I see. Why did you not ask the person himself who appeared in your dream about it? You should have asked him at the time.
What is lost even now? Go on doing dhyana until he comes back and tells you,'  said Bhagavan. Unable to understand the significance
of that, the young man said, 'Will he really come back to me and give me the required information if I go on doing dhyana?'

'You may or may not be informed where that avatara purusha is. If you do not give up dhyana but do it continuously you will
realize the Truth. Then there will be no room for any doubts,' said Sri Bhagavan.

*****

Arunachala Siva.         

[Subramanian.R]

133. Jnana Drishti:

.......

In the meantime, a fussy young man who had recently come, asked: 'Swami! It seems a Jnani has Jnana drishti (super natural
vision) apart from bahya drishti (external vision). Will you please do me the favor of giving me that Jnana drishti? Or will you tell
me where there is a person who could give it to me?  Sri Bhagavan replied: 'That Jnana drishti must be acquired by one's own
effort and is not something that any body can give.'  The devotee said, 'It is said that the Guru himself can give it if he so
pleases.' Bhagavan replied: 'The Guru can only say 'if you follow this path, you will gain Jnana drishti'. But who follows it? A
Guru who is a Jnani is only a guide but the walking (i.e. sadhana) must be done by the sishyas themselves.' The young man
got disappointed and went away.

******

Arunachala Siva.     

[Subramanian.R]

159.  The Path of Self Enquiry:

This afternoon, a devotee asked  Bhagavan: 'Swami, for gaining Realization, is the enquiry, 'Who am I?' the only way?'

Sri Bhagavan answered him:  'Enquiry is not the only way. If one does spiritual practice (sadhana) with name and form, repetition
of holy names, (japa), or any of these methods with grim determination and perseverance, one becomes That. According to the
capacity of each individual, one spiritual practice is said to be better than another and several shades and variations of them
have been given. Some people are a long way from Tiruvannamalai, some are very near; some are in Tiruvannamalai, while some
get into Bhagavan's Hall itself. For those who come into the Hall, it is enough, if they told as they step in, 'Here is the Maharshi', and
they realize Him immediately. For others they have to be told which route to take, which trains to catch, where to change, which
road to turn into. In like manner, the particular path to be taken must be prescribed according to the capacity of the practiser
(sadhaka). These spiritual practices are not for knowing one's own Self, which is all pervading, but only for getting rid of the objects
of desire. When are these are discarded, one remains as one IS.

........

Arunachala Siva.     
   

[Subramanian.R]

158. Remembrance and Forgetfulness:

At 3 O'clock this afternoon, the white peacock came into Bhagavan's presence and began moving about in the midst of us
all. A devotee, noticing how tame it was, remarked, 'This bird appears to have knowledge of its previous births. Would it
otherwise move so freely in the midst of all these people?

Bhavavan said: 'That is why so many people here say that it is Madhava (an old attendant of Bhagasvan who had recently
passed away) who has come here in this form.'

The devotee asked, 'If so, will it know that it was so and so in its last birth?'

Bhagavan: How could it? No one knows about his previous birth. People forget, and that forgetfulness is good. If this one life
alone, we are sometimes terribly worried over what had happened in the past. Could we bear such worries if we knew all about
our previous births? Knowing the facts of previous births means knowing one's own Self. If that is known this birth and the previous
births will seen to be of the mind and its desires (sankalpas) only. See in how many different ways this creations has been described
in Vasishtam. When  Gadhi asked Krishna to show him his illusory bodies (maya swarupam), He showed him innumerable forms.
The story of Lavana Maharaja is also like that, and the story of Sukra is still more interesting. It is told that Sukra remained in Samadhi
without realizing that his body  had meanwhile completely decayed and was no longer in existence. As last he was born as a
brahmin and, while leading an austere life on Mount Meru, his father Bhrugu with the God of Death in their human bodies (sthuala
sariram) went to him and told him all that had happened during his births and rebirths. Sukara then accompanied them both and saw
his original body and, with the permission of the God of Death, entered into it. In some other stories it is told that what 
appeared to one person in a dream, another saw it in the waking state itself. Among these, which story is true? - asked Sri
Bhagavan.

.........

Arunachala Siva.         

[Subramanian.R]

109. ABSOLUTE SURRENDER:

....

Arjuna had to the fighting. So Krishna said, 'Place all the burden on Me, do your duty. You are merely an instrument. I will
see to everything. Nothing will bother you.' But then, before one surrenders to God, one should know who it is that surrenders.
When there are no thoughts at all, what remains is only the Self. So surrender will only be to one's Self.  If surrender is in
terms of bhakti, the burden should be thrown to God, and if it is in terms of karma, karma should be performed until one knows
one's own Self. The result is the same in either case. Surrender means to enquire and know about one's own Self and then
remain in the Self. What is there apart from the Self?

........

Arunachala Siva.     

[Subramanian.R]

161. Poor Man's Mite:

.......

Sri Bhagavan used to tell us that sometimes He started for pradakshina at night and returned by day break.
......

"On one occasion, we started to go round in the morning, with the intention of returning the same evening. We stopped at
the Gautama Asramam, cooked our food, ate it and after taking some rest, packed all the milk, sugar, buttermilk, etc., that remained
and started walking again.  As we were approaching Adi Annamalai, Sri Bhagavan began walking off on a side road and very fast.
Thinking that He wished to avoid the crowds on the main road, we followed Him.

'After going along a path for about half a furlong, we came to a tank. At the edge of the tank and under a tree, sat an old
man, his body covered by a blanket and holding a small pot in his hand. This old man, whenever he heard that Sri Bhagavan
was coming round the Hill, would await Bhagavan's arrival on the road, and lest the poor man should be troubled at missing Him,
Bhagavan had made the detour.

'Bhagavan, on seeing him called him by name and began talking with him very freely. The old peasant prostrated before Sri
Bhagavan, then stood with folded hands, saying nothing. 'What is the matter?' said Bhagavan. 'Why is that I do not see you
anywhere these days? Are crops and cattle alright? How are the children? And then, 'What is in the pot?' queried Bhagavan.

'Very hesitantly, the old man said, 'Nothing particular, Swami. I came to know that you were coming. I wanted to bring something,
as usual to offer you, but there was nothing in the house. When I asked my old woman, she said, 'There is ample food in the
cooking pot. You can take it to them.' Unable to decide what to do, I put some of the food into this small pot, but ashamed to face
you with only this sort of food to offer you, I was sitting here, Swami.'

'Bhagavan, seemingly very pleased, exclaimed, 'Oh! Cooked food, is it? That is excellent. Why be ashamed? It will be very good.
Let me have it.' As the old man was still hesitating, Sri Bhagavan took the pot from him, sat down under a tree and told his followers
to put down all the things they had brought. We did accordingly. Bhagavan took out from among the cooking things, a big open
mouthed tin lined vessel into which He put all the food, poured in a lot of water, and mixed it well into paste with His hand. Then
from some  left overs among our things, He took out some limes and squeezed the juice into the mixture, poured some buttermilk
and made the whole thing into a liquid. Finally He mixed some salt and dry ginger powder then took out the tumblerful of the liquid
and drank it and then said, 'Oh, this is delicious! This is the first rate food for me in this hot weather. It is also very nourishing!'

'Please also give some share (of our food) to this old man.' He said.

The whole scene was like Krishna eating Kuchela's beaten rice and going to Vidura's house for eating.

(Nagamma as told by Kunju Swami)

Arunachala Siva.         
             

[Beloved Abstract]

saraskrishna ... you're very welcome   

[Subramanian.R]

130.  Hastha Masthaka Samyogam (Touching of the head with the hand by way of blessing.)

Some people might say, "From what you have written, it is clear that Sri Bhagavan not only declines to allow Pada Puja (worship
of the feet), abhisheka (worship with water)  and ucchishta tirtha prasadam, but actually condemns them. But then, in Guru
Geeta and other books, it is stated that Guru Pada Puja, Padodaka panam (taking in water with which the feet of the guru are
washed) and the like are approved religious practices. Some elders have accepted such practices from their disciples. What then
is the explanation?".

What can I say? Sri Bhagavan is in a highly exalted state and has realized the oneness of the Self with the universe so as to
dispense with the distinction between Guru and sishya. Hence He does not require these practices and always maintains that
they are meant only for those who have not yet given up the belief that the body is identical with Atma, and that it is for the
satisfaction of such people that these practices have been laid down by some ancients. 

It may then be asked, 'If that is so, why does He remain indifferent when some of these acts are done and object to them
afterwards?'  When two or three people do it once in a way, He may not mind it and feel sorry that they have not yet got over
the belief that the body is identical with Atma, but if it becomes a regular practice, how can He refrain from objecting?

****               

Arunachala Siva.

[Subramanian.R]

131. Vicharamani Maala:

It appeared that the book Vicharamani Maala was got printed by one Arunachala Mudaliar. As however, Sri Bhagavan's name
was not mentioned therein, it remained unknown.

Some one asked, 'What induced Sri Bhagavan to write this book?'

Bhagavan replied: 'Sadhu Nischaladas wrote Vichara Sagaram in Hindi. It is full of arguments. and elaborate. Arunachala Mudaliar
asked me to write a smaller version. I wrote it. He immediately published it. That was about 30 years ago.... I was afraid that every
one would come with a book and ask me to summarize it. So I kept quiet when it was published in the name of Arunachala Mudaliar.
The book's original name was Vichara Sagaram. I changed it into Vicharamani Maala.

Later Mouni Srinivasa Rao made Rajagopala Iyer to request me to write it in Telugu. I also asked Sri Bhagavan.

He eventually wrote it in Telugu also and this was got printed.  The book was later published/reprinted in both the languages.

*****

Arunachala Siva.   
 

[Balaji]

As one Desires
13th August 1946

During the early days of my arrival at the Ashram, there
was a Vaisya boy living here. His hair was matted without
being attended to. He used to get food from charitable house
holders, and sleep in the Arunachala Temple at night. His
mother came to the Ashram and pressed him to return home,
and so he ran away to Pandharpur. He was her only son.
They had plenty of property. The boy was a sort of wandering
beggar, a bairagi, who would say that he did not want
anything. When that mother related her woeful story to
Bhagavan and sought his help, Bhagavan tried to prevail
upon the boy, once or twice, to listen to the mother’s words.
He did not listen, but instead, he ran away.
He came again during last month. He was keeping away
from others, sitting in a corner of the hall. You may call it
sadhana or whatever you like. Except that his hair was no
longer matted there was no other change in his routine or
appearance. Bhagavan was observing him continuously. The
boy did not speak. After fifteen days, Rajagopala Iyer, who
had retired from his job and come back to his library work
in the Ashram, happened to come to the hall and noticing
the Vaisya boy, said to Bhagavan, “This boy appears to have
 returned from Pandharpur. His mother left her address,
didn’t she, requesting us to write to her in case he came
back?”.

Bhagavan said, “Yes, he has come back. That was about
fifteen days ago. I have been observing him. He does not
speak. So, how then could I ask him ‘What is Pandharpur
like? Where is the prasadam, etc.?’ We have to conduct
ourselves according to the workings of the minds of others.
We are in duty bound to adjust ourselves thus.” People of
intelligence examine their own minds. There is no knowing
about the minds of others. Bhagavan says that he has to
adjust himself according to the desires and intentions of
others! See what a great precept that is!

[Subramanian.R]

195. The History of Cow Lakshmi:

(I have abridged it)

One Sri Arunachalam Pillai brought Cow Lakshmi (which was a calf then) along with her mother, sometime in 1926. With great
reluctance Sri Bhagavan accepted them with Ramanatha Brahmachari offering to take care of them. Soon the mother cow died.
It was agreed with Sri Pillai that if there are male calves for Lakshmi, they will be retained by the Asramam and if there are female
calves, they would be given to Pillai. Lakshmi grew up and for some time, it was left with one local person to take care, and Lakshmi
used to come in the morning and evening to see Sri Bhagavan.

Soon Lakshmi came to stay permanently in the Asramam, some time from 1930. She delivered three calves all males and they were
retained by the Asramam. Soon Pasupati who was taking care of Lakshmi earlier had some difficulties and Lakshmi was taken
care with more care. Bells were bought to tie them around her neck. On every year on the day after Sankaranti, which is called \
Mattu Pongal, the Pongal for cows and bulls, her horns were painted and new bells were tied around her neck. She used to come
freely into the Hall and take plantains from Sri Bhagavan.

Salem Sundaram Chetty, a devotee of Sri Bhagavan bore the expenses for a Cow Shed, which was built towards the end of
1930s.

*****

Arunachala Siva.
       

[Subramanian.R]

87. DIVINE FORCE:

I went to the Hall at 2.30 this afternoon. Sri Bhagavan was there already, reading a slip of paper which someone had
handed over to Him. I sat there waiting to hear what Bhagavan would say. Bhagavan folded the paper with a smile and said,
'All this will occur if one thinks that there is a difference between Bhagavan and oneself. If one thinks that there is no such
difference, all this will not occur.'

Is it enough if we say that there is no difference between Bhagavan and ourselves? Is it not necessary to enquire who oneself
is, and what one's origin is, before one thinks that there is no difference between oneself and Bhagavan? Why is Bhagavan saying
this? I was thinking of asking Bhagavan why He was thus misleading us but could not summon up enough courage to do so.
I do not know if Bhagavan sensed this misgiving of mine; but anyway He Himself began speaking again as follows:

'Before one could realize that there is no difference between him and Bhagavan, one should first discard all these unreal
attributes which are really not his. One cannot perceive truth unless all these qualities are discarded. There is a Divine Force,
Chaitanya Sakti which is the source of all things. All these other qualities cannot be discarded unless we get hold of that force.
Sadhana is required to get hold of that force.'

I got courage as I heard those words and said unconsciously, 'So there is a force?' 'Yes', replied Bhagavan.  'There is a force
and it is that force that is called Swasphurana (consciousness of the Self),' I said with a quivering voice, 'Bhagavan said casually
that it is enough if we think that there is no difference between us and God. But we can discard these unreal attributes only if
we are able to get hold of that force. Let it be divine force or the consciousness of the Self. Whatever it is, should we not know
it? We are not able to know it however much we try.'

Never before this did I ask Bhagavan questions in the presence of others so boldly. Today, the inner urge was so great that words
came out of my mouth of their own accord in the course of the conversation, and my eyes were filled with tears and so I turned
my face towards the wall. A lady sitting next to me told me afterwards that Bhagavan's eyes also became moist. How tender hearted
He is towards the humble!

Bhagavan sometimes used to say, 'The Jnani weeps with  the weeping, laughs with the laughing, plays with the playful, sings with
those who sing, keeping time to the song. What does He lose? His presence is like a pure, transparent mirror. It reflects our image
exactly as we are. It is we that play the several parts in life and reap the fruits of our actions. How is the mirror or the stand on
which it is mounted affected? Nothing affects them, as they are mere supports. The actors in this world -- the doers of all acts --
must decide for themselves what song and what action is for the welfare of the world, what is in accordance with sastras, and
what is practicable.'  That is what Sri Bhagavan used to say. This is a practical illustration.

******

Arunachala Siva.