clarify on Swami Vivekananda's last days

[Ravi.N]

Friends,
Yes Swamiji used to smoke and occasionally ate meat as well.Sri ramakrishna also used to smoke.We find this excerpt in the Gospel:
"Sri Ramakrishna washed his face. A smoke was prepared for him. He said to M.: "Is. it
dusk now? If it is, I won't smoke. During the twilight hour of the dusk you should give up
all other activities and remember God." Saying this he looked at the hairs on his arm. He
wanted to see whether he could count them. If he could not, it would be dusk."

Neither Swamiji nor Sri Ramakrishna were puritanical.
Subramanian has asked about the blood oozing out of nose and also eyes during the Passing away of Swami Vivekananda.I have already posted what is said about it.Somehow these thoughts never interested me or occurred to me.These Great ones are beyond any of the yardstick that we may be familiar with.It is the Life that they lived and what they were in their essence-this is what is inspirational and is of perennial interest.
Namaskar.


Namaskar.

[Nagaraj]

Dear i,

yes, truly so.

Jnaneshwar says,

His rule of conduct is his own sweet will.
His meditation is whatever
He happens to be doing.

in Ashtavakra Gita,

अलं त्रिवर्गकथया योगस्य कथयाप्यलम् ।
अलं विज्ञानकथया विश्रान्तस्य ममात्मनि ॥ ७ ८ ॥

Alam trivargakathayaa yogasya kathayaapyalam
alam vijnaanakathaa vishraantasya mamaatmani

For me, who am reposing in Self, there is no need of talking
about the three ends of life, about yoga and about wisdom.

Salutations to Bhagavan

[Ravi.N]

 
 He opened his lips again. "All my patriotism is
gone. Everything is gone. Now it's only
'Mother Mother !'
"I have been very wrong," he said
simply, after another pause. "Mother said
to me 'What, even if unbelievers should
enter My temples, and defile My images !
What is that to you ? Do you protect ME ?
Or do I protect you ?' So there is no more
patriotism. I am only a little child !"

We come to the words of Swamiji which people latch on  and say whatever the imagine!

There is a sea of difference when A Great one says that 'I have been wrong' and when an ignorant person says the same thing!
More on this a little later.
Namaskar.

[Nagaraj]

very humbling.

we too, are only a little child

[Subramanian.R]

Dear Ravi,

I think that the incident happened in Ksheer Bhavani Temple in Himalayas which Swami Vivekananda visited and seeing its
dilapidated condition told Bhavani and he would arrange for its reconstruction and protect it.

Arunachala Siva.

[Ravi.N]

The Story of Swamiji's pilgrimage to Amarnath and Ksheer Bhavani:

At Pahlgam the village of the shepherds the camp halted for a day, to keep  ekadasi. It was a beautiful little ravine
floored, for the most part with sandy islands  in the pebble-worn bed of a mountain stream. The slopes about it were dark with
pine-trees, and over the mountain at its head  was seen, at sunset, the moon, not yet  full. It was the scenery of Switzerland or
Norway, at their gentlest and loveliest* Here we saw the last of human dwellings, a  bridge, a farm house, with its ploughed fields,
and a few saeter-huts. And here, on a  grassy knoll, when the final march began, we  left the rest of our party encamped.
Through scenes of indescribable beauty,  three thousand of us ascended the valleys  that opened before us as we went. The first
day we camped in a pine-wood ; the next, we had passed the snow-line, and pitched our  tents beside a frozen river. That night, the
great camp-fire was made of juniper, and  the next evening, at still greater heights, the servants had to wander many miles, in search
of this scanty fuel. At last the regular pathway  came to an end, and we had to scramble up  and down, along goat-paths, on the face of
steep declivities, till we reached the boulder- strewn gorge, in which the Cave of Amar-nath was situated. As we 'ascended this, we
had before us the snow-peaks covered with a white veil, newly-fallen ; and in the Cave itself, in a niche never reached by sunlight,
shone the great ice-lingam, that [must have  seemed, to the awestruck peasants who first came upon it, like the waiting Presence
of God.
The Swami had observed every rite of the pilgrimage, as he came along. He had told his beads, kept fasts, and bathed in the
ice-cold waters of five streams in succession, crossing the river-gravels on our second day. And now, as he entered the Cave, it seemed
to him, as if he saw Siva made visible before  him. Amidst the buzzing, swarming noise of  the pilgrim-crowd, and the overhead fluttering
of the pigeons, he knelt and prostrated two or three times, unnoticed ; and then, afraid lest emotion might overcome him, he rose and
silently withdrew. He said afterwards that in these brief moments he had received from Siva the gift of Amar, not to die, until he
himself had willed it, In this way, possibly,  was defeated or fulfilled that presentiment  which had haunted him from childhood, that
he would meet with death, in a Siva temple amongst the mountains.
Outside the Cave, there was no Brahminic exploitation of the helpless people. Amar- nath is remarkable for its simplicity and close-
ness to nature. But the pilgrimage culminates -on the great day of Rakhibandhan, and our wrists were tied with the red and yellow
threads of that sacrament. Afterwards, we rested and had a meal, on some high boulders beside the stream, before returning to our tents.
The Swami was full of the place. He felt that he had never been to anything so beautiful. He sat long silent. Then
he said dreamily, "I can well imagine how this Cave was first discovered. A party of shepherds, one summer day, must have
lost their flocks, and wandered in here in search of them. jThen, when they came home to the valleys, they told how they had
suddenly come upon Mahadev ! "

Of my Master himself, in any case, a like story was true. The purity and whiteness of the ice-pillar had startled and enwrapt him.
The cavern had revealed itself to him as the secret of Kailas. And for the rest of his life, he cherished the memory of how he had en-
tered a mountain-cave, and come face to face there with the Lord Himself.Everything in our life up to the time of
the pilgrimage to Amarnath had been associated with the thought of Siva. Each step had seemed to draw us closer to
the great snow-mountains that were at once His image and His home. The young moon resting at night-fall above the glacier-cleft and the tossing pines, had
suggested irresistibly the brow of the Great God. Above all, that world of meditation on whose outskirts we dwelt, had Him as its
heart and centre, rapt and silent, "above all qualities and] beyond the reach of thought."
Undoubtedly this Hindu idea of Siva is the highest conception of God as approached by the spiritual intuition of man. He is the
Divine accessible within, and purified of all externals.
The Master ,as I saw Him-Sister Nivedita

[Ravi.N]

The Story of Swamiji's vist to Ksheer Bhavani temple continued...
It may possibly be, that in the pursuit of uttermost knowledge, this personification of the unmanifesting, is necessarily succeeded
by the opposite conception of God as the power behind all manifestation. It is clear at least that he who has sounded the depths
of both these, will be capable of understanding the significance, of every possible human symbol of the divine, since all must be
included in one or other of the two. If the Supreme is thought of by man at all, it must be either as Infinite Being or as
Infinite Power. Whether there is any such law of nature behind the fact or not, must remain a speculation. In some imperceptible
way, at all events, the Swami's attention appeared to shift, during the month of August, from Siva to the Mother. He was
always singing the songs of Ram Prasad, as if he would saturate his own mind with the conception of himself as a child. He told
some of us once, that wherever he turned he was conscious of the presence of the Mother, as if She were a person in the room.
It was always his habit to speak simply and naturally of ''Mother," and some of the older members of the party caught this, so
that such phrases as "Well, well ! Mother knows best !" were a constant mode of thought and speech amongst us, when, for
instance, some cherished intention had to be abandoned.
Gradually, however, his absorption became more intense. He complained bitterly of the malady of thought, which
would consume a man, leaving him no time for sleep or rest, and would often become as insistent as a human voice. He had con-
'stantly striven to make clear to us the ideal of rising beyond the pairs of opposites, beyond pain and pleasure, good and evil
alike, that conception which forms the Hindu solution of the problem of sin, but now he seemed to fasten his whole attention
on the dark, the painful, and the inscrutable, in the world, with the determination to reach by this particular road the One Behind
Phenomena. Baffled as he found himself in the object of his visit to Kashmir, "the worship of the Terrible" now became his
whole cry. Illness or pain would always draw forth the reminder that "She is the organ. She is the pain. And She is the Giver of
pain, Kali ! Kali ! Kali ! "His brain was teeming with thoughts, he said one day, and his fingers would not rest
till they were written down. It was that same evening that we came back to our houseboat from some expedition, and found waiting for
us, where he had called and left them, his manuscript lines on "Kali the Mother".Writing in a fever of inspiration, he had
fallen on the floor, when he had finishedas we learnt afterwards, exhausted with his own intensity."
The Master as I saw Him-Sister Nivedita
to be continued...

[Ravi.N]

The Story of Swamiji's Pilgrimage to Ksheer Bhavani continued...

    Kali The Mother

The stars are blotted out,
     The clouds are covering clouds
It is darkness vibrant, sonant.
     In the roaring, whirling wind
Are the souls of a million lunatics
     Just loosed from the prison-house,
Wrenching trees by the roots,
     Sweeping all from the path.

The sea has joined the fray,
     And swirls up mountain-waves,
To reach the pitchy sky.
     The flash of lurid light
Reveals on every side
     A thousand, thousand shades
Of Death begrimed and black —
     Scattering plagues and sorrows,
Dancing mad with joy,
     Come, Mother, come!

For Terror is Thy name,
     Death is in Thy breath.
And every shaking step
     Destroys a world for e'er.
Thou 'Time', the All-destroyer!
     Come, O Mother, come!

Who dares misery love,
     And hug the form of Death,
Dance in Destruction's dance,
To him the Mother comes.
Continued...

[Ravi.N]

The Story of swamiji's pilgrimage to Ksheer Bhavani continued...
About this time, he had taken his boat away from our vicinity, and only a young Brahmo doctor, who was also living in
Kashmir that summer, and whose kindness and devotion to him were beyond all praise, was allowed to know where he was, and
to enquire about his daily needs. The next evening the doctor went, as usual, but finding him lost in thought, retired without
speaking, and the following day, September the thirtieth,1898 he had gone, leaving word that he was not to be followed, to Kshir Bhowani,
the coloured springs. He was away, from that day till October the sixth,1898.
In the afternoon of that day we saw him coming back to us, up the river. He stood in front of the dunga, grasping with one hand the
bamboo roof-pole, and with the other holding yellow flowers. He entered our houseboat, a transfigured presence, and silently passed
from one to another blessing us, and putting the marigolds on our heads. "I offered them to Mother," he said at last, as he ended by
handing the garland to one of us. Then he sat down. "No more 'Hari Om !' It is all 'Mother,' now !" he said, with a smile. We
all sat silent. Had we tried to speak, we should have failed, so tense was the spot, with something that stilled thought. He
opened his lips again. "All my patriotism is gone. Everything is gone. Now it's only 'Mother Mother !'
"I have been very wrong," he saidsimply, after another pause. "Mother said to me 'What, even if unbelievers should
enter My temples, and defile My images ! What is that to you ? Do you protect ME ? Or do I protect you ?' So there is no more
patriotism. I am only a little child !"
Then he spoke on indifferent matters, about the departure for Calcutta, which he desired to make at once, with a word or two
as to the experience of physical ill into which his perplexities of mind had translated themselves, throughout the past week. "I
may not tell you more now : it is not in order," he said gently, adding, before he left us, "But spiritually, spiritually, I was not
bound down !"

We saw very little of the Swami, during the next few days. Before breakfast the next morning, indeed, two of us were with
him on the river-bank for a moment, when, seeing the barber, he said "All this must go !" and left us, to come out again half-an-hour
later, without a hair. Somehow, in ways and words that could scarcely be recounted, came to us now and then a detail of that
austerity, by which, in the past week, such illumination had come. We could picture the fasting ; the offering of milk and rice
and almonds daily, in the spring ; and the morning worship of a Brahmin pundit's little daughter, as Uma Kumari the Divine
Virgin ; the whole, meanwhile, in such a passion of self-renunciation, that not one wave of reaction could be found in his conscious-
ness for any injury, however great.
A man came one day to ask a question, and the Swami, in monastic dress and with shaven head, happened to enter. "Ought
one to seek an opportunity of death, in defence of right, or ought one to take the lesson of the Gita, and learn never to
react ?" was the problem put to him. "I am for no reaction," said the Swami, speaking slowly, and with a long pause. Then he
added " for Sannyasins. Self-defence for the householder !"

The mood seemed to grow upon him, and deepen. He spoke of this time once, as 'a crisis in his life.' Again, he called him-
self a child, seated on the lap of the Mother, and being caressed. And the thought came to us, unspoken, that these Her kisses might
make themselves known to mind and nerves
as anguish, yet be welcomed with rapture of recognition. Did he not say "There could be bliss in torture"

As soon as it could be arranged, we left for Baramulla, which we reached on Tuesday evening, October the eleventh. It had
been settled that he would go on to Lahore the following afternoon, while we waited some days longer. On the way down the
river, we saw very little of him. He was almost entirely silent, and took long walks by the riverside alone, rarely even entering our
houseboat for a moment. His health had been completely broken, by the labours of his return to India ; and the physical ebb of
the great experience through which he had just passed for even suffering becomes impossible, when a given point of weariness is
reached ; and similarly, the body refuses to harbour a certain intensity of the spiritual life for an indefinite period ! was leaving
him, doubtless, more exhausted than he himself suspected. All this contributed, one imagines, to a feeling that none of us knew for
how long a time we might now be parting, and it was this thought, perhaps, that brought him to say goodbye on Wednesday morning,
as we finished breakfast, and made him stay to talk.Hour after hour went by, that morning, and it is easier to tell of the general
impression created, than to build it up again detail by detail. We who listened, seemed to be carried into an innermost sanctuary.
Sometimes he would sing and translate some
snatch or other of devotional poetry, always to the Mother. And it was always Kali, with Her foot on the heart of Her worshipper,
Who grew clearer to our minds ; though he dwelt much, and over and over again, on the thought of the Mother, seated in the market-
place of this world, playing amongst the players ; flying Her own kite, and in a hundred thousand cutting the strings of
only one or two."Scattering plagues and sorrows," he
quoted from his own verses, "Dancing mad with joy, Come, Oh Mother, come ! For Terror is Thy name !
Death is in Thy breath. And every shaking step Destroys a world for e'er" "It all came true, every word of it," he
interrupted himself to say."Who dares misery love. Dance in Destruction's dance, And hug the form of death,
To him the Mother does indeed come". "I have proved it. For I have hugged the
form of Death !"

He spoke of the future. There was nothing to be desired, but the life of the wanderer, in silence and nudity, on the banks
of the Ganges. He would have nothing. "Swamiji" was dead and gone. Who was he, that he should feel responsible for teach-
ing the world ? It was all fuss and vanity. The Mother had no need of him, but only he of Her. Even work, when one had seen
this, was nothing but illusion. There was no way but love. If people sinned against us, we must love them till it
was impossible for them to resist it. That was all. Yet, as I write the words, I know well that I can give no idea of the vastness
of which all this was utterance,as if no blow, to any in the world, could pass and leave our Master's heart untouched ; as if no
pain, even to that of death, could elicit anything but love and blessing.
The Master As I Saw Him-Sister Nivedita
continued...

[Nagaraj]

these last years of Swamiji is really touching. Something, never seen before, of him. a corner, which burst forth, a volcanic eruption, of his bhakti, devotion, love for Mother Kali is indeed very moving.

a small child, i see, all saints are verily a child, pure innocent child, full of wisdom, who become light for so many.

Salutations to Bhagavan

[Ravi.N]

Krishna/friends,
Swamiji's words need to be understood carefully.We only need to remember what Swami Turianandaji (Hari Maharaj),his brother disciple has to say: “Whenever Swamiji used the pronoun ‘I,’ he was identified with Brahman and used the word from the nondualistic standpoint."
These incidents have to be understood from this standpoint.It is to say that all the work that Swamiji did was all the work of the Divine Mother only.It is not as if 'Swamiji' wanted to 'Reform the world'.If we do not understand the spirit behind these bhavas,we will be lead astray.These should not be taken literally as if Swamiji regretted what he had done!Nothing can be far from Truth.The Build up to the Ksheer Bhavani incident is key-swamiji was soaked in the Mother-He himself was the Mother and he himself was the Devotee!
It is like when Sri Bhagavan prays for 'kAdal perukku'-it is not as if he is doing it for 'himself'!
I will continue what swamiji said to a disciple regarding the ksheer Bhavani .
Namaskar.

[Ravi.N]

Swamiji's conversations with Saratchandra Chakravarthy,a disciple....

It is two or three days since Swamiji has returned from Kashmir. His health is indifferent. When the disciple came to the Math, Swami Brahmananda said, "Since returning from Kashmir, Swamiji does not speak to anybody, he sits in one place rapt in thought; you go to him and by conversation try to draw his mind a little towards worldly objects."

The disciple coming to Swamiji's room in the upper storey found him sitting as if immersed in deep mediation. There was no smile on his face, his brilliant eyes had no outward look, as if intent on seeing something within. Seeing the disciple, he only said, "You have come, my son? Please take your seat", and lapsed into silence. The disciple seeing the inside of his left eye reddened asked, "How is it that your eye is red?" "That is nothing", said Swamiji and was again silent. When even after along time Swamiji did not speak, the disciple was a little troubled at heart and touching his feet said, "Won't you relate to me what things you have seen at Amarnath?" By the disciple's touching his feet, the tensity of his mood was broken a little, as if his attention was diverted a little outwards. He said, "Since visiting Amarnath, I feel as if Shiva is sitting on my head for twenty - four hours and would not come down." The disciple heard it with speechless wonder.

Swamiji: I underwent great religious austerities at Amarnath and then in the temple of Kshir Bhavani. Go and prepare me some tobacco, I will relate everything to you.

The disciple joyfully obeyed the order. Swamiji slowly smoking began to say, "On the way to Amarnath, I made a very steep ascent on the mountain. Pilgrims do not generally travel by that path. But the determination came upon me that I must go by that path, and so I did. The labour of the strenuous ascent has told on my body. The cold there is so biting that you feel it like pin - pricks."

Disciple: I have heard that it is the custom to visit the image of Amarnath naked; is it so?

Swamiji: Yes, I entered the cave with only my Kaupina on and my body smeared with holy ash; I did not then feel any cold or heat. But when I came out of the temple, I was benumbed by the cold.

Disciple: Did you see the holy pigeons? I have heard, in that cold no living creatures are found to live, but a flight of pigeons from some unknown place frequents the place occasionally.

Swamiji: Yes, I saw three or four white pigeons; whether they live in the cave or the neighboring hills, I could not ascertain.

Disciple: Sir, I have heard people say that the sight of pigeons on coming out of the temple indicates that one has really been blessed with the vision of Shiva.

Swamiji: I have heard that the sight of the pigeons brings to fruition whatever desires one may have.

Then Swamiji said that on the way back he returned to Srinagar by the common route by which the pilgrims return. A few days after returning to Srinagar, he went to visit Kshir Bhavani Devi and staying there for seven days worshipped the Devi and made Homa to her with offerings of Kshira (condensed milk). Every day he used to worship the Devi with a maund of Kshira as offering. One day, while worshipping, the thought arose in Swamiji's mind: "Mother Bhavani has been manifesting Her Presence here for untold years. The Mohammedans came and destroyed her temple, yet the people of the place did nothing to protect Her. Alas, if I were then living I could never have borne it silently." When, thinking in this strain, his mind was much oppressed with sorrow and anguish, he distinctly heard the voice of the Mother say - ing, "It was according to My desire that the Mohammedans destroyed this temple. It is My desire that I should live in a dilapidated temple, otherwise, can I not immediately erect a seven - storeyed temple of gold here if I like? What can you do? Shall I protect you or shall you protect me!" Swamiji said, "Since hearing that divine voice, I cherish no more plans. The idea of building Maths etc. I have given up; as Mother wills, so it will be." The disciple, speechless with wonder, began to think, "Did he not one day tell me that whatever I saw and heard was but the echo of the Atman within me, that there was nothing outside?"-- and fearlessly spoke it out also --"Sir, you used to say that Divine Voices are the echo of our inward thoughts and feelings." Swamiji gravely said, "Whether it be internal or external, if you actually hear with your ears such a disembodied voice, as I have done, can you deny it and call it false? Divine Voices are actually heard, just as you and I are talking."

The disciple, without controverting accepted Swamiji's words, for his words always carried conviction.
This wonderful incident in the Life of Swamiji exemplifies that all the work that a Great one carries out is in accord with Divine will-there is no room for any egoistic effort in all this.We will see in the very next conversation,how Swamiji exhorts the Disciple.All aspirants will benefit by reading the life and teachings of Swamiji.Truly this sort of a multisided approach we rarely come across,and the whole of life with all its vastness and complexity (If we read the divinely inspired poem Kali the Mother,this is what is there!)is embraced .We come to realize why Sri Ramakrishna revered Narendra,who later became known as Swami Vivekananda.

[Ravi.N]

Swamiji's conversations with Saratchandra Chakravarthy,a disciple-continued....

The Math is still situated in Nilambar Babu's garden house at Belur. It is the month of November. Swamiji is now much engaged in the study and discussion of Sanskrit scriptures. The couplet beginning with "Achandala - pratihatarayah ", he composed about this time. Today Swamiji composed the hymn, "Om Hring Ritam " etc., and handing it over to the disciple said, "See if there is any metrical defect in these stanzas." The disciple made a copy of the poem for this purpose.

On this day it seemed as if the goddess of learning had manifested herself on his tongue. With the disciple he fluently talked about two hours at a stretch in exceedingly melodious Sanskrit. After the disciple had copied the hymn, Swamiji said, "You see, as I write immersed in thought, grammatical slips sometimes occur; therefore I ask you all to look over them."

Disciple: Sir, these are not slips, but the licence of genius.

Swamiji: You may say so; but why will other people assent to that? The other day I wrote an essay on "What is Hinduism", and some amongst you even are complaining that it was written in a very stiff Bengali. I think, language and thought also, like all other things, become lifeless and monotonous in course of time. Such a state seems to have happened now in this country. On the advent of Shri Ramakrishna, however, a new current has set in, in thought and language. Everything has now to be recast in new moulds. Everything has to be propagated with the stamp of new genius. Look, for example, how the old modes of Sannyasins are breaking, yielding place to a new mould by degrees. The Sannyasins of the present day have to go to distant countries for preaching, and if they go in an ash - besmeared, half - nude body like the Sadhus (holy men) of old, in the first place they won't be taken on board the ships, and even if they anyhow reach foreign countries in that dress, they will have to stay in jail. Everything requires to be changed a little according to place, time, and civilisation. Henceforth I am thinking of writing essays in Bengali. Litterateurs will perhaps rail at them. Never mind -- i shall try to cast the Bengali language in a new mould. Nowadays, Bengali writers use too many verbs in their writings; this takes away the force of the language. If one can express the ideas of verbs with adjectives, it adds to the force of the language; henceforth try to write in that style. Try to write articles in that style in the Udbodhan. Do you know the meaning of the use of verbs in language? It gives a pause to the thought; hence the use of too many verbs in language is the sign of weakness, like quick breathing, and indicates that there is not much vitality in the language; that is why one cannot lecture well in the Bengali language. He who has control over his language, does not make frequent breaks in his thoughts. As your physique has been rendered languid by living on a dietary of boiled rice and dal, similar is the case with your language. In food, in modes of life, in thought, and in language, energy has to be infused. With the infusion of vitality all round and the circulation of blood in all arteries and veins, one should feel the throbbing of new life in everything -- then only will the people of this land be able to survive the present terrible struggle for existence; otherwise the country and the race will vanish in the enveloping shadows of death at no distant date.

Disciple: Sir, the constitution of the people of this country has been moulded in a peculiar way through long ages. Is it possible to change that within a short time?

Swamiji: If you have known the old ways to be wrong, then why don't you, as I say, learn to live in a better way? By your example ten other people will follow suit, and by theirs another fifty people will learn. By this process in course of time the new idea will awaken in the hearts of the whole race. But even if after understanding, you do not act accordingly, I shall know that you are wise in words only -- but practically you are fools.

Disciple: Your words, sir, infuse great courage, enthusiasm, energy and strength into the heart.
continued....

[Ravi.N]

Swamiji's conversations with Saratchandra Chakravarthy,a disciple-continued....

Swamiji: By degrees the heart has to be strengthened. If one man is made, it equals the result of a hundred thousand lectures. Making the mind and lips at one, the ideas have to be practised in life. This is what Shri Ramakrishna meant by "allowing no theft in the chamber of thought". You have to be practical in all spheres of work. The whole country has been ruined by masses of theories. He who is the true son of Shri Ramakrishna will manifest the practical side of religious ideas and will set to work with one - pointed devotion without paying heed to the prattling of men or of society. Haven't you heard of the couplet of Tulsidas: "The elephant walks the market - place and a thousand curs bark at him; so the Sadhus have no ill - feeling if worldly people slander them." You have to walk in this way. No count should be taken of the words of people. If one has to pay heed to their praise or blame, no great work can be accomplished in this life. "[(Sanskrit)]-- the Atman is not to be gained by the weak." If there is no strength in the body and mind, the Atman cannot be realised. First you have to build the body by good nutritious food -- then only will the mind be strong. The mind is but the subtle part of the body. You must retain great strength in your mind and words. "I am low, I am low"-- repeating these ideas in the mind, man belittles and degrades himself. Therefore, the Shastra (Ashtavakra Samhita, I.11) says: "[(Sanskrit)]--

He who thinks himself free, free he becomes; he who thinks himself bound, bound he remains -- this popular saying is true: 'As one thinks, so one becomes'." He alone who is always awake to the idea of freedom, becomes free; he who thinks he is bound, endures life after life in the state of bondage. It is a fact. This truth holds good both in spiritual and temporal matters. Those who are always down - hearted and dispirited in this life can do no work; from life to life they come and go wailing and moaning. "The earth is enjoyed by heroes"-- this is the unfailing truth. Be a hero. Always say, "I have no fear." Tell this to everybody --"Have no fear". Fear is death, fear is sin, fear is hell, fear is unrighteousness, fear is wrong life. All the negative thoughts and ideas that are in this world have proceeded from this evil spirit of fear. This fear alone has kept the sun, air and death in their respective places and functions, allowing none to escape from their bounds. Therefore the Shruti says (Katha Upanishad, II.iii,3) says: "[(Sanskrit)] -- Through fear of this, fire burns, the sun heats; through fear Indra and Vayu are carrying on their functions, and Death stalks upon this earth." When the gods Indra, Chandra, Vayu, Varuna will attain to fearlessness, then will they be one with Brahman, and all this phantasm of the world will vanish. Therefore I say, "Be fearless, be fearless."

Swamiji, in saying these words, appeared in the eyes of the disciple like the very embodiment of "fearlessness", and he thought, "How in his presence even the fear of death leaves one and vanishes into nothingness!"

Swamiji continued: In this embodied existence, you will be tossed again and again on the waves of happiness and misery, prosperity and adversity -- but know them all to be of momentary duration. Never care for them. "I am birthless, the deathless Atman, whose nature is Intelligence"-- implanting this idea firmly in your heart, you should pass the days of your life. "I have no birth, no death, I am the Atman untouched by anything"-- lose yourself completely in this idea. If you can once become one with this idea, then in the hour of sorrow and tribula - tion, it will rise of itself in your mind, and you will not have to strive with difficulty to bring it up. The other day, I was a guest of Babu Priyanath Mukherjee at Baidyanath. There I had such a spell of asthma that I felt like dying. But from within, with every breath arose the deep - toned sound, "I am He, I am He". Resting on the pillow, I was waiting for the vital breath to depart, and observing all the time that from within was being heard the sound of "I am He, I am He!" I could hear all along "[(Sanskrit)]-- the Brahman, the One without a second, alone exists, nothing manifold exists in the world."

The disciple, struck with amazement said, "Sir, talking with you and listening to your realisations, I feel no necessity for the study of scriptures."

Swamiji: No! Scriptures have to be studied also. For the attainment of Jnana, study of scriptures is essential. I shall soon open classes in the Math for them. The Vedas, Upanishads, the Gita, and Bhagavata should be studied in the classes, and I shall teach the Panini's Ashtadhyayai.

Disciple: Have you studied the Ashtadhayayi of Panini?

Swamiji: When I was in Jaipur, I met a great grammarian and felt a desire to study Sanskrit grammar with him. Although he was a great scholar in that branch, he had not much aptitude for teaching. He explained to me the commentary on the first aphorism for three days continuously, still I could not grasp a bit of it. On the fourth day the teacher got annoyed and said, "Swamiji, I could not make you understand the meaning of the first aphorism even in three days; I fear, you will not be much benefited by my teaching." Hearing these words, a great self - reproach came over me. Putting food and sleep aside, I set myself to study the commentary on the first aphorism independently. Within three hours the sense of the commentary stood explained before me as clearly as anything; then going to my teacher I gave him the sense of the whole commentary. My teacher, hearing me, said, "How could you gather the sense so excellently within three hours, which I failed to explain to you in three days?" After that, every day I began to read chapter after chapter, with the greatest ease. Through concentration of mind everything can be accomplished -- even mountains can be crushed to atoms.

Disciple: Sir, everything is wonderful about you.

Swamiji: There is nothing wonderful in this universe. Ignorance constitutes the only darkness, which confers all things and makes them look mysterious. When everything is lighted by Knowledge, the sense of mystery vanishes from the face of things. Even such an inscrutable thing as Maya, which brings the most impossible things to pass, disappears. Know Him, think of Him, by knowing whom everything else is known. And when that Atman is realised, the purport of all scriptures will be perceived as clearly as a fruit on the palm of one's hand. The Rishis of old attained realisation, and must we fail? We are also men. What has happened once in the life of one individual must, through proper endeavour, be realised in the life of others. History repeats itself. This Atman is the same in all, there is only a difference of manifestation in different individuals. Try to manifest this Atman, and you will see your intellect penetrating into all subjects. The intellect of one who has not realised the Atman is one - sided, whereas the genius of the knower of Atman is all - embracing. With the manifestation of the Atman you will find that science, philosophy, and everything will be easily mastered. Proclaim the glory of the Atman with the roar of a lion, and impart fearlessness unto all beings by saying, "Arise, awake, and stop not till the goal is reached."
How does swamiji sound here!He is his usual vedanta-kesari,the lion of Vedanta that he always is!
Namaskar.

[Ravi.N]

The Conversations of Swamiji with Saratchandra chakravarthy continued...
[Place: The rented Math premises at Belur. Year: 1898.]

The disciple is staying with Swamiji at the garden-house of Nilambar Babu at Belur for the last two days.

Today, Swamiji has given permission to the disciple to stay in his room at night. When the disciple was serving Swamiji and massaging his feet, he spoke to him: "What folly! Leaving such a place as this, you want to go back to Calcutta! See what an atmosphere of holiness is here — the pure air of the Ganga — what an assemblage of Sadhus — will you find anywhere a place like this!"

Disciple: Sir, as the fruition of great austerities in past lives, I have been blessed with your company. Now bless me that I may not be overcome by ignorance and delusion any more. Now my mind sometimes is seized with a great longing for some direct spiritual realisation.

Swamiji: I also felt like that many times. One day in the Cossipore garden, I had expressed my prayer to Shri Ramakrishna with great earnestness. Then in the evening, at the hour of meditation, I lost the consciousness of the body, and felt that it was absolutely non-existent. I felt that the sun, moon, space, time, ether, and all had been reduced to a homogeneous mass and then melted far away into the unknown; the body-consciousness had almost vanished, and I had nearly merged in the Supreme. But I had just a trace of the feeling of Ego, so I could again return to the world of relativity from the Samâdhi. In this state of Samadhi all the difference between "I" and the "Brahman" goes away, everything is reduced into unity, like the waters of the Infinite Ocean — water everywhere, nothing else exists — language and thought, all fail there. Then only is the state "beyond mind and speech" realised in its actuality. Otherwise, so long as the religious aspirant thinks or says, "I am the Brahman" — "I" and "the Brahman", these two entities persist — there is the involved semblance of duality. After that experience, even after trying repeatedly, I failed to bring back the state of Samadhi. On informing Shri Ramakrishna about it, he said, "If you remain day and night in that state, the work of the Divine Mother will not be accomplished; therefore you won't be able to induce that state again; when your work is finished, it will come again."

Disciple: On the attainment of the absolute and transcendent Nirvikalpa Samadhi can none return to the world of duality through the consciousness of Egoism?

Swamiji: Shri Ramakrishna used to say that the Avataras alone can descend to the ordinary plane from that state of Samadhi, for the good of the world. Ordinary Jivas do not; immersed in that state, they remain alive for a period of twenty-one days; after that, their body drops like a sere leaf from the tree of Samsâra (world).

Disciple: When in Samadhi the mind is merged, and there remain no waves on the surface of consciousness, where then is the possibility of mental activity and returning to the world through the consciousness of Ego? When there is no mind, then who will descend from Samadhi to the relative plane, and by what means?

Swamiji: The conclusion of the Vedanta is that when there is absolute samadhi and cessation of all modifications, there is no return from that state; as the Vedanta Aphorism says: " —  There is non-return, from scriptural texts." But the Avataras cherish a few desires for the good of the world. By taking hold of that thread, they come down from the superconscious to the conscious state.

Disciple: But, sir, if one or two desires remain, how can that state be called the absolute, transcendent Samadhi? For the scriptures say that in that state all the modifications of the mind and all desires are stamped out.
continued...