Author Topic: Removing bitterness in human interactions - implementing Ellam Ondre  (Read 2562 times)

Anand

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 292
  • Anand
    • View Profile
dear friends,
For a long time , I was suffering from migraine and later discovered that one important reason was  negative feelings which I harboured , though only for that instant ,towards the other person especially when the interaction worked against me.
Now in every interaction I try to imagine even at the start of the conversation ,Annamaliyar or Bhagavan inside that person and even in a hostile situation, I am succeeding though in bits and pieces (i.e sometimes I remember this , most times I forget) to avoid harbouring ill feelings towards the other person.
Can any one else share other methods with strong emotional content , to see the oneness in all and which could help to see everyone and everything  in every interaction as Brahman.
As Bhagavan had said,I find that this Ellam Ondre Bhava is very helpful for Sadhana but I am not able to practically see how to implement and hence am requesting for some guidance in this aspect .
Regards,Anand.
Sundaram Anand

Subramanian.R

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 43530
    • View Profile
Re: Removing bitterness in human interactions - implementing Ellam Ondre
« Reply #1 on: August 13, 2011, 03:48:50 PM »


Dear Ananda Sundaram,

The migraine in most cases [some cases it is heridirtary] are emotion
based.  In English also it is said, "that he was a pain in my neck."  Pain
in the neck is also mostly an emotionally induced illness.  In my case,
I am known for my short tempered nature, but nowadays I am trying
to avoid such anger which is not sattvika, by great restraint or chating
Arunahchala Siva, Arunachala Siva.  Sattvic anger is anger due to
injustice done to oneself or to one's own dear ones. This anger is
welcome. But here again, not in huge doses.

Generally people say, to avoid anger or an bad emotion, you should
count 1 to 100 or drink some water, but this does not help in all cases.

Sri Bhagavan also used to express His anger very rarely, as a Sattvic
anger, upon erring attendants or others.



Arunachala Siva.       

SLakshmi

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 225
    • View Profile
Re: Removing bitterness in human interactions - implementing Ellam Ondre
« Reply #2 on: August 25, 2011, 01:29:39 PM »
Dear Anandji,

Its been my personal experience that although i may not get angry, i do carry a lot of bitterness and hatred against a person who may have said anything bad about me or have done/told something wrong about me..

I am nowadays practising this : 1.to disengage yourself to the outcome of any action that you undertake.
2. start a day, project, conversation etc after thinking of bhagavan for a second and surrendering that very action or the day to him and not bothering about what comes out of it. Just giving your best effort after taking bhagavan's name.

3. leave the result to bhagavan. Have the faith that once you have started with bhagavan in your mind, whatever maybe the result - good or bad - is what bhagavan wishes. Remember - bhagavan always wishes you well! :)

Ramanarpamastu

Subramanian.R

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 43530
    • View Profile
Re: Removing bitterness in human interactions - implementing Ellam Ondre
« Reply #3 on: August 25, 2011, 02:58:19 PM »


Dear SLakshmi,

What you have posted is a good spiritual practice.

Anger, greed, misery, fear, pain etc., will not leave us in one day.  A constant practice
will definitely help us to achieve progress.

Ellam Ondre - comes at the end of Sadhana.



Arunachala Siva. 

amiatall

  • Guest
Re: Removing bitterness in human interactions - implementing Ellam Ondre
« Reply #4 on: August 25, 2011, 07:23:43 PM »
Indeed. Good spiritual practice. For example, a person comes to whom you have this or that mental attitude, so before engaging with that person one can think of Bhagavan, then there is some gap before every your saying to that person. In that gap may various attitudes arise but because of holding Bhagavan in thought you are not carried by them. Thus breaking the believe in that arising phenomena. As time passes, Bhagavans thought burns the believes in arising phenomena i.e. taking them as real. The real remains.

Subramanian.R

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 43530
    • View Profile
Re: Removing bitterness in human interactions - implementing Ellam Ondre
« Reply #5 on: August 25, 2011, 07:32:46 PM »


Dear amiatall,

Very nice. Between two thoughts, two speeches, think of Sri Bhagavan. That shall make you
prepared for a speech without bad emotions, and actions without bad emotions.

Sri Krishna is called Idaiyan, i.e a cowherd in Tamizh.  This word also has got a meaning,
One who is in between. God or Guru is in between two thoughts. When you go to a Hindu
temple, the queue sometimes moves horizontally in front of the sanctum.  When you are
away at a far distance, between two persons in a moving queue, you can see God's image,
for a second!  So God or Guru is truly in between two thoughts.  Sri Bhagavan has also said
that the Self can be experienced between two successive thoughts.



Arunachala Siva. 

nonduel

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 292
    • View Profile
Re: Removing bitterness in human interactions - implementing Ellam Ondre
« Reply #6 on: August 25, 2011, 10:54:26 PM »
Sri Bhagavan gave the perfect method for anger and all the rest. "Working" on these is only leaving one's attention on the self. Whatever method one uses, it is always going outward, and will brings only more thoughts like I should do this, do that etc... All the while one has "lefted" enquiry.

Self-attention is the perfect means for the destruction of the thoughts and all other "imperfections" like anger. These are only thoughts. A person tells you something that hurts you and this starts an outpour of thoughts which leads to outburst of anger.

Returning to self-attention makes one become a witness. It is the reaction to the thoughts that evolves to all the rest.

This is surrendering and Bhakti.

To rest in Bhagavan.
Oh Arunachala, blazing fire of Jnana, in my heart I pray and think of Thee from afar, root out the ego, merging me in the Self.

SLakshmi

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 225
    • View Profile
Re: Removing bitterness in human interactions - implementing Ellam Ondre
« Reply #7 on: August 27, 2011, 12:02:41 AM »
Subramanian sir,

Thanks. This practice not only helps in removing hatred or ignoring such thoughts but also while taking decisions in life. If one is undecided about what to do, the best thing is to think of bhagavan and do what one feels is good for him/her and is right. Also even during simple things like writing an exam etc, i think of bhagavan and then proceed.


Ramanarpamastu