The 1st instance used to bother me until some time ago. I have no clue how, but the fear vanished of its own accord. I used to chant bhagavan's name whenever i was scared, but now a sudden power-cut in the middle of the night, even when i am alone, dosent bother me much, although it does me me alert and awake. So, remembering bhagavan's name and chanting does help in such situations.
I have experienced the 2nd instance also. Even in ramanasramam when i had gone this time, just narrating someone a part of bhagavan's life, possibly gave me a thrill and made me very happy and accomplished. They appreciated me and i felt good. Even when i sing at sri bhagavan's sannidhi and people say i sing well, i am elated. I am sure it creates a 'aham' in me, but feeling good about being able to share bhagavan's life with soemone is fine...isnt it? isnt there anything called a good 'aham' or a bad 'aham'!?
3rd instance would make me ashamed of myself. I believe that if you claim to be a devotee of bhagavan, then behave like one. Not that i can claim to be a fitting devotee, but i aspire to! I have short-comings and would give in to anger, selfish-ness and other things, but i remind myself of sri bhagavan's teachings and work on it rectify them slowly. so, as bhagavan said, i would not remind myself of the mistake. what has happened has happened. Try not to slip again..
4th instance - in such situations, i am slowly cultivating the art of trying your best and leaving the rest to sri bhagavan. If there is nothing you can do, then no point getting frustated, angry etc etc. If your work has to be done, it will be done. You did what you could, and now if without your fault you face failure, then accept it with grace. sri bhagavan wills so. When i went to arunachaleswarar temple on sivaratri day, it was sri bhagavan who helped me get darshan, even when no tickets were even being sold that day! and what, within a span of 10 mins of my entrance, i was facing sri arunachaleswarar himself!! And i remember distinctly telling within myself 'bhagavan sorry! i wont be able to have your darshan today. It is impossible!'
In all instances, cultivating faith and surrendering is the key. I am a rank new comer. I try and fail so many times. Above, I may have sounded as though i have conqered all feelings, but just the other day i blew my lid off over something stupid! but...i say forget it, say sorry to sri bhagavan and dont repeat it!