Author Topic: Staying with the Self has been a lonely path  (Read 3462 times)

Matthew

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Staying with the Self has been a lonely path
« on: March 13, 2009, 09:59:21 AM »
The Self is always present of course, but as my mind is active the veil is often present. 

In my pursuit of increasing my conviction of the teachings of Ramana I have been increasingly alienated from the people I commonly encounter.  I live in Canada.  It seems that the things most people love are the things that I am not interested in, and the the things that I am interested in are the things that most people want to avoid.

It's been very hard to meet people, or maintain friendships/relationships. 

Even the Buddhist/spiritual people I've met locally seem to be just as confused and not interested in the kind of spirituality that Ramana talked about as the average person I encounter.  In fact, I've often found the spiritual people I've met to be even more self-deceived and distorted. 

So maybe this is a call for me to pursue the Self and lessen my desire for human contact.

But the fact is that that desire for human contact is there.

I'm just venting here.  But I'd be curious to hear about other people's experience meeting people.  It seems to me that a real friend is someone who helps you to remove the veil.   

Whoever made this forum, and whoever is hosting/maintaining it, thank you.  I appreciate it.

Subramanian.R

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Re: Staying with the Self has been a lonely path
« Reply #1 on: March 13, 2009, 10:22:48 AM »
Dear Matthew,

During self enquiry, one often desires to avoid people, not because
he hates them, but because they do not appreciate your way.  This
alientation and identity crisis take place, in every pursuer.  In place
like India, there are many spiritually oriented people, and you may
befriend such like minded people.  But in places like Canada, there
are not many such people and it is hard to find them.  In Qubec,
Canada, I know one person but I cannot tell you his name and address, since he himself does not want many people to know him.
Anyway, this is the way of self enquiry, and the Self is all alone, since there is nothing other than the Self.  But once you reach the goal, then
all people around you will become interesting to you.

Arunachala Siva. 

Nagaraj

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Re: Staying with the Self has been a lonely path
« Reply #2 on: March 13, 2009, 11:02:48 AM »
Dear Matthew,

I have gone through and still going through a similar crises or rice pounding as
we may like to call it! Yes the points you mentioned are so very true. Even I
find it very difficult to keep in touch with people, material pursuits die,
people find me serious, some well wishers concerns bewilder me. Have I gone
crazy? or am I to see this difference positively? is it an advancement or is it a reverse?

The BIG FACT I have come to understand is that there is no help outside! I have
to unearth whatever it is all by myself, and nobody is going to confer a boon,
etc... You get a boon when you are ready!

I have also come to understand that there is no-other at all! everything is in
our mind alone. there are no other persons at all. I am only in your mind. you
are only in my mind! this way I am you, you am I

You mentioned:

In my pursuit of increasing my conviction of the teachings of Ramana I have been
increasingly alienated from the people I commonly encounter.  I live in Canada. 


The thought that you are alienated from people is within you and the people who
you feel alienated you is also you (within you)! The images, the opinions of so called
other people are simply within us. SO they are all you alone

We are all nothing but thoughts. Thoughts = 'You' or 'I'

When you say:

It seems that the things most people love are the things that I am
not interested in, and the the things that I am interested in are the things that most people
want to avoid.


the things people love is also you and the thing you are interested is also you.
How do 'I' know the things other people love? its your own 'my' thought!
and how do 'I' know what most people want to avoid? its again your own
'my' thought!

There is no other at all! It all only you! The one against you and for you is
only you!

When you say:

Even the Buddhist/spiritual people I've met locally seem to be just
as confused and not interested in the kind of spirituality that Ramana talked about as the
average person I encounter.  In fact, I've often found the spiritual people I've
met to be even more self-deceived and distorted. 


Those Buddhist/ spiritual people are also you alone. They seem confused to you
because, there is a confusion within, for there is no outside at all! The opinion
that they themselves are confused is yours alone.

Suppose I say something to you and you read it. you understand it based on your
own thoughts, accumulated knowledge over last thousands of years. Its your own
thoughts  that interpret whatever you gather.

Now note this:

My reply to your post here is a reply to the your own (my) question.
and when you read my response

Its your own response to your own (my) response

I am not there at all. I am in you, and for me you are not there at all, You am in I

What you mention is true, desire for human contact is there. Let it be. Why do you want to get away from human contact?

Dear Matthew

I feel you would immensely benefit by reading one of our previous topics discussed here in this forum

Arunachala Ramana > Ramana Maharshi > The teachings of Bhagavan Sri Ramana Maharshi > Why do i not realize the Truth ?

The best way to describe it is like this:

'I' am the biggest problem to myself. Ramana says find out this 'I' and you will find that this 'I' is actually non existent!

Nagaraj


« Last Edit: March 13, 2009, 11:19:54 AM by Nagaraj »
॥ शांतमात्मनि तिष्ट ॥
Remain quietly in the Self.
~ Vasishta

DRPVSSNRAJU

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Re: Staying with the Self has been a lonely path
« Reply #3 on: March 13, 2009, 11:51:51 AM »
Many people can neither live with the other nor can they live without the other.

When they live with someone else their presence disturbs.When one is alone one wants company of

the other.This is my general observation of the people at large.
pvssnraju

vinita

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Re: Staying with the Self has been a lonely path
« Reply #4 on: March 13, 2009, 07:45:36 PM »
So maybe this is a call for me to pursue the Self and lessen my desire for human contact.

But the fact is that that desire for human contact is there.


Of course, it is a lonely path....
But it also teaches us to be one with others.
There is a negative about "loneliness", but "aloneness" in the centre of which is "oneness" feels positive.
In loneliness we wither...whereas we can thrive and bloom when we are one with others....even when we are alone....

Of course, whatever we "feel" is an emotion or a thought identified with "i". When there is no "i" is there no feeling or emotion about anything????????? Since i have not attained such a state, i dunno! ;D

silentgreen

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Re: Staying with the Self has been a lonely path
« Reply #5 on: March 13, 2009, 08:24:14 PM »
Spiritual life is profound.
Only in spiritual life can one discover true bliss and peace.

In worldly life, peace is often felt only during absence of disturbance,
and bliss only when a sorrow ends.

In spiritual life these can be felt in absolute sense and life seems to get
fulfilled to the very core.

During spiritual journey it is but natural that worldly friends gradually recede to the
background and one develops closeness with spiritually-oriented persons.

It is best to leave things to God.
God will send the right friend when one needs one.

Om ..
Homage to the Universal Being...Om Shanti ... Om Shanti ... Om Shanti ...

munagala

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Re: Staying with the Self has been a lonely path
« Reply #6 on: March 13, 2009, 08:24:42 PM »
Mathew,

Enquire to whom the lonliness is? this would have been the reply of Ramama to your question  :)

Regards,
Sambu

paul

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Re: Staying with the Self has been a lonely path
« Reply #7 on: March 14, 2009, 01:36:08 AM »
Hi Matthew
There is only my wife who knows of my spiritual quest, she is not on the same spiritual path as me nor me as her. It makes no difference to either of us. You can’t force any of it onto anyone. To other people I keep quiet about it . When I’m out walking the dog I think about and try to practise Self enquiry but if I meet someone I know who is walking their dog, a conversation is struck about the weather, their dog or something happening in the area for example. That’s life, most of the time social interactions are like that. I would be surprised if I to find some like minded person socially. And it does help though by engaging in those types of social interactions for a sense of well being. And there will be another time when Self Enquiry can be practiced again.

You have said yourself that a desire for human contact is there. There is nothing wrong with that. Don't try to get too much out of it. I hope this is helpful.

Regards.
Paul

Matthew

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Re: Staying with the Self has been a lonely path
« Reply #8 on: March 14, 2009, 11:13:11 AM »
Thank you all for the sincere replies and for reminding me what I am.

I understand (intellectually and maybe more) the notions of wholeness, non-duality, etc. ... and I understand that all the concerns I raised are really only in the mind and could not rise if I was more stabilized in the Self/less dominated by mind.  I spoke the way I did for the sake of simplicity and convenience.

It's nice to know that others can relate to or understand what I am describing.