Author Topic: how do you experience yourselfs?  (Read 5283 times)

matthias

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how do you experience yourselfs?
« on: October 30, 2008, 06:55:09 PM »
In this topic I would like to exchange inner happenings of the seekers at the moment, what is there in their sadhana//life, how does it feel...I would like to start this discussion because I think if we will come across similarities in experience,Intuition and expression of who we really are, we could benefit on our way...I think it could be helpfull to get rid of ignorance and get closer to the truth...

I start with my condition:

usually the meditation and enquiery is part of my day, it does not stop, I do not have a fixed time...

since some days I feel that Iam expressed...it is hard to explain in words, I just feel an energy that comes from nowhere and expresses itself, it is a ongoing feeling and the best word to discribe it is expression.....I cannot say stop or come, I cannot meditate about it nor can I avoid when it is there....it is a very sweet and loving feeling...

it seems to be very subtile in nature, it feels alittle like seeing with the eyes of an atom (again my skin is vibrating, my body feels very weightless and good, warm and embraced)....jet if I want to see the center of this expression the center is gone...or when I want to see the where it comes from it is gone, or not there...

when I am still (no movement, no talking, no work, no sitting down to meditation...then the feeling is very clear, very near, when I talk, and do something it vanishes, or I get swallowed by what I do)

when this "feeling" is obvious or percieved by me then Iam this energy, and there is no need to ask who am I, or to meditate...but at the same time it is not stainless or pure awereness, it is a cleared self awereness but not supreme...jet when I rest as this energy Iam happy and ok, it feels like this is not coming or going it is always there and at the same time I loose it again and again...

I also cannot sleep very good since one day......when i lay down to sleep then this feeling is there, and for me I cannot sleep out of this energy, till now, we will see how it workes today....this periods of no sleeping is a usual thing for me, some times I sleep very very well, just one interruption (thirst or toilet) or I do not sleep at all....this not sleeping always comes when something chnaged in my awereness, or mostly...

maybe some advice and also some insights in your present condition

much love
peace peace peace



Subramanian.R

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Re: how do you experience yourselfs?
« Reply #1 on: October 31, 2008, 09:44:30 AM »
Dear Matthias,

Your various 'bhavas', or feelings like "inexpressible feeling",
"weightlessness and warmth",  "seeing with every pore of the skin",
horripilation, causeless shedding of tears are all good.  There are
times when I feel choked or weep whenever I hear or tell
Arunachala.  I should only say that these are like  someone
giving you a bottle of lemonade in a long distance running!  Do
accept it and proceed further.

Arunachala Siva.

matthias

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Re: how do you experience yourselfs?
« Reply #2 on: October 31, 2008, 11:39:25 AM »
thank you for the answers, they are as always very helpfull and uplifting...and of course a challenge

but I would also like to know... how are you?

Subramanian.R

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Re: how do you experience yourselfs?
« Reply #3 on: October 31, 2008, 12:06:45 PM »
Dear Matthias,

I am fine, by Bhagavan Ramana's Grace.  All these external 'bhavas'
still continue.  Sometimes fear, sometimes bad feelings, sometimes
extraordinarily good feelings.  I do not know. 

One simple example.  When I knew from the Forum that the
Administrator has pruned 783 of my posts, because they are
infringing the copyright laws and for other reasons, this came as
a Diwali gift, you know, I felt bad for a full day.  Several thoughts
came up.  Why all this?  It is like a child building sand houses on
the beach and suddenly a wave coming and removing everything.
But I remembered Chadwick's life.  He had done the entire complete
works of Sri Ramana and wanted to show them to Bhagavan Ramana
and publish them.  Meantime, the news came that Arthur Osborne's
English translation is going to come out.  Then Chadwick quietly
placed the entire manuscripts in front of Bhagavan Ramana and left.
     
Nothing will be done or undone, without the knowledge of Bhagavan
Ramana, because He is everywhere, all pervading, in and out, vertical
and horizonal, at all times.

Arunachala Siva.

matthias

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Re: how do you experience yourselfs?
« Reply #4 on: October 31, 2008, 12:30:51 PM »
yes superb indeed, what will happen will happen or :)

why all this?

why not..

we are in fact totally helpless people, helpless jivas, the day that bhagavan came in my life was the day my soul started to be swallowed by this ocean of stillness...now Iam helpless, and this is the nature of my ego, beeing helpless in front of bhagavan, naked and helpless

how gracefull he is......he humbles me to the bone, and jet he was so much smaller....

I expect that this "bhavas" are there to ultimately step beyond them.....the last step, you have to expereince the up and down of smsara, the rising of the "I-thought" the drowning of the "I-thought" in the vast bliss ocean etc...all just to get the final AHA....the bhavas will continue, maybe even increase..and jet nothing happens anymore...

how blissfull to be THAT....how much pain to always be it without surrender to it....

peace peace peace

may his grace eliminate my ignorance and the ignorance in the world at large


S.Subramanian

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Re: how do you experience yourselfs?
« Reply #5 on: November 06, 2008, 08:49:36 PM »
As the ego tries to know itself it begins to partake less and less of the body and more and more of the consciousness.  This must be the reason for the less awareness of the weight of the body.  Thoughts dissipate energy.  When the mind is subdued, the energy transforms into a potential energy field.  Weightlessness and feeling of energy must be sure signs of progress in self-enquiry.

ramanaduli

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Re: how do you experience yourselfs?
« Reply #6 on: November 06, 2008, 09:34:46 PM »
Dear sirs,

Previously, when my work or idea were denied by the other people, I was so feeling low, I could not take the denial. I used feel more unstable. But after the self enquiry, my mind accepts its result. My inner most voice tells, so what, nothing would happen to ME. This feeling gives more energy to go further. As it does not affect me I feel fullness. No lements no cries no weeping. Whether we see God or not self enquiry helps lot  in day to day life and gives more space to understand others.Because nO BODY able to insul or damag. WE ARE SELF, SELF AND SELF ONLY.EVER BORN AND DIED.


Ramanaduli

Subramanian.R

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Re: how do you experience yourselfs?
« Reply #7 on: November 07, 2008, 09:47:23 AM »
Dear Ramanaduli,

Whenever your idea or work is denied by others, we have to take
it in such a way that it is the wish of Bhagavan Ramana and He
knows the best.  Bhagavan has often used to say:  Nin Ishtam, En
Ishtam, that is Your Wish is My wish.  This is the way in which we
have to proceed. 

Arunachala Siva.

ramanaduli

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Re: how do you experience yourselfs?
« Reply #8 on: November 07, 2008, 09:00:52 PM »
Actually the mind only makes the ideas and planning. When the mind is not active, the heart will act by which
all works would take place. The ego wants to survive and not leting the heart to be awakened. That is the
problem. As Bhagavan say, when ideas does not take place, we have to accept as it is divine will.
It is the age old of habits.

Ramanaduli

Subramanian.R

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Re: how do you experience yourselfs?
« Reply #9 on: November 08, 2008, 09:51:43 AM »
Dear Ramanaduli,

Mind sunk in the Heart acts thorugh the Heart, the Self.  Here
there is no doership.

Mind in company of brain acts through brain, with a lot of doership
and egoity.

Arunachala Siva.