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« on: March 11, 2017, 10:20:54 AM »
By now a few months had gone by since my stay at Pudupalayam. I decided to return home and continue my practice back there, so took leave of the Swami. Back home,
observing silence, I practiced rigorously but could make no progress. I continued in a state of limbo for a couple of years, losing my earlier poise, but not gaining any new ground. While so, my guru, after undertaking a tour of several places in Tamizh Nadu, now returned. In his entourage came some wealthy, influential persons, and with them the Gounder of Pudupalayam too. The Swami now made a pronouncement that he shall enter into Jeeva Samadhi (entombment while alive) on a particular day of a particular month a year from hence. He added that these wealthy folk had come to erect, in advance, a cave like tomb at the proposed samadhi site.
The building of a large tomb was afoot, at a site three miles from my village. The Swami, obtaining my father's permission, took me to be with him. There he declared that I was his prime disciple and that after his Jeeva Samadhi, I would succeed as the head of his mutt. I was put off by all this ostentation and publicity mongering. My mind was restless. A few months passed and I could no longer stand it. In anguish,
I blurted out to the Swami, 'So much time has gone by but I am unable to experience Self realization. Are there no realized souls living today, like the Maharishis of yore who had lived during the ancient times of the Yoga Vasishtam?'
To my query, the Swami replied, 'Oh, yes! There lives a sage in Tiruvannamalai whose name is Ramana Maharshi. He attained the experience of Jnana at the age of sixteen and abides ever in that state. I visited Him and had His darshan.' I was amazed at this news, and felt as though struck by a surge of electric current. It was an exhilaration the likes of which I had never before felt. So excited was I, I wanted to fly to Tiruvannamalai at once.
Instantly I sought permission to proceed there, much to his annoyance. 'I shall be entering Jeeva Samadhi six months from now. You ought to be present here to take care of things then. After that, you are at liberty to go where you please,' he admonished me. I was in a state of despair when a friend of mine from my neighboring village came to see me. His name was Ramakrishna, a year or two older than me. He had a special affection and regard for me on account of my spiritual disciplines, which he too was after. He was of a wealthy family and arrangements by his elders were to conduct his wedding. But he was least inclined towards matrimony and one day he came to me to seek a way out of this immediate tangle.
I immediately told him, 'I hear there is a sage in Tiruvannamalai known as Ramana Maharshi. I myself feel an intense longing to go to Him but I am tied up for the next six months by my guru's orders. Therefore, you set out forthwith for Tiruvannamalai.
Later on I shall join you. As soon as you reach there write to me all about the sage and the spiritual teaching you receive from him.'
contd.,
Arunachala Siva.